What's going on out there?

In an email from FOS Peter Berman:

At the audition you are instructed to enter, go on stage and say your name and where you live. You are then supposed to direct you material at the "talent scouts" Alonzo (Bodden), Kathleen (Madigan), and Ant. I went in and said, "Hi, I am Peter Berman and I live in Los Angeles." I then said to the "scouts" what I thought might be cute/funny, ""Randy, Paula, Simon..." and then Ant immediately says "Next! I have heard enough."

I was stunned. He was serious.

I then asked if he was serious and he said yes he was. I then mumbled something to the effect of "Well, you really are playing the part." A few moments passed and Alonzo said to Ant, "Come on, man." They were then willing to listen to my two minutes.

I should not have even bothered as it was most definitely over at this point, but I guess the needy comedian in me took over and I tried to proceed. I did my first little joke (that always works in the clubs) and got zip. I should have stopped here, but I didn't. I do another little bit and then finish. Kathleen says to Ant, "You look exhausted." He replies "Well, I haven't changed my mind." Alonzo then says, "Thanks, Pete." And that was that.

And this from the MySpace blog of FOS Dan Rosenberg:

I was lucky to have established myself enough to not have wait in line for 24 hours like some people did Monday at the Improv. I know a few people and I had a 12:45 audition spot. I didn't get to go in until 2pm and I almost had the balls to complain...but when the guy sitting next to me tells me he got there at 5 o'clock YESTERDAY, how can I complain about walking right in and only having to wait an hour and fifteen minutes?

Anyway, as each comic was exiting the room, one common thing came out of their mouth..."That ANT can kiss my ass" or "F*CK ANT!" So I knew ahead of time that Ant was trying his hardest to be the Simon Cowell (or in his case Bowel) of this show. I have been doing this crap long enough to know that A) Reality shows aren't real, and 2) They are looking for drama...and there aren't too many queens more dramatic than "Tony" aka ANT.

I was ready...I go in, do my first joke and NOTHING! All three of them (oh, I forgot to mention, the other judges were Alonzo Bodden and Kathleen Madigan, who were also previous contestants on the show) they just stared at me like the sound was off and they had no idea what I was saying...here is the joke and the way the rest of the audition went:

DAN: My idol, Rodney Dangerfield died the day after I
finished reading his book. It made me go on a search...not a soul
search, per se, I want to Barnes and Noble to see if Carrott Top had a
book.

ALONZO, KATHLEEN, ANT stare into space as if I just said something very quietly in an alien language.

DAN: Nothin? Really? You see, if I read HIS book, maybe Carrott Top would die the next day...or lose his props...still nothin?

ANT: Ok, I've seen enough, THANK YOU!

DAN: Great. Thanks! (Exit stage left)

We're beginning to detect a pattern here. Hmmm... We know the producers feel like they need some tension, some conflict, etc., but this makes everybody look bad.

We're at a loss to explain the hostility. Was not Ant one of the luckiest little insects on the face of the earth when he emerged from Season 2004 with the remnants of a career... as a standup comic... sorta. So where is all this hostility coming from? Why isn't he one of the jolliest, back-slappingest, most benevolent member of the Family Formicidae to ever touch a microphone? (And, if memory serves us correctly, Ant said the "n-word" on network television! Or he said it just off camera and caught hell from fellow LCS inmate Corey Holcomb. And he lives to tell about it! What a difference 21 months makes! That right there makes him the luckiest comic on the planet right now. Just ask Michael Richards. You know, Kramer.)

We were skeptical of the show's concept when we first heard about it before the launch of Season 1. Then we relented and covered Season 2 pretty comprehensively. We were appalled at the hose job they dealt Bodden on Season 3. Season 4 was reality television from Hell. We're fearful of Season 5. Now that Ant has his antennae all twisted, we're certain the whole season will be a hellish nightmare.

Of course, we'll be blogging about it. Stay tuned.

When we last heard about Bob Nelson, he was negotiating the purchase of a church. To be more precise, a building to house his congregation. (Nelson, in addition to being a clown-- his preferred description-- is also a born-again Christian.)

His latest career move takes him to Branson, MO, as a regular performer (Tuesdays through Saturdays, 6 PM, for the foreseeable future, with a brief break to perform on a cruise to Alaska hosted by Gospel recording artist Michael W. Smith) at Justin Flom's Imaginary Theatre. (We didn't know what that was, either. So we hopped onto Justin Flom's website, where we learned that young Flom is a magician and an evangelical one at that.)

Branson is unlike any other place on the planet. (We found ourselves there for a night or two, back in the early 90s, between road gigs. It could be described as a clean-cut Vegas carved out of the Missouri wilderness. The main drag is dotted with steakhouses and theaters and hotels. We saw Willie Nelson at the Jose Cuervo Theater... he was disastrously awful! We assume that Willie and the band were the only ones consuming any Cuervo inside Branson city limits!)

The folks who bring us madras shorts and all kinds of faux Bohemian wear (Shall we call it "Faux-Bo?") for college dudes and dudettes who wanna spend a fortune but not look like they spent a fortune, are sponsoring a comedy tour. And they're encouraging a boatload of college-aged faux comics (Shall we call them "Faux-Coms?") to enter an online contest, the winner of which gets to "perform live at Spring Break with American Eagle!" Gulp! It's not so much a prize as it is a punishment! There are seasoned comedians who want to slash their wrists (or, at the very least, throttle their agent and drop out of the business) after performing for a Spring Break audience!

Visit the AEComedy website to send your favorite comic to his/her doom!

At a brief stop in Searchlight, CA, on the way from Phoenix to Vegas this morning, The Male Half slipped on a banana peel! (Longtime readers may recall that The Female Half slipped on a banana peel not once but twice, putting her in a very small class of people who can make a similar claim.)

What are the odds, you may ask? (We already did. Way back when TFMHOTS slipped on her second peel, we consulted, via a friend, with a statistician, who opened his speculation thusly:

Given that your friend slipped twice on banana
peels, my first question is, "Does she own monkeys?"

I suspect that banana peel slippage statistics are
pretty hard to come by. You might just check out
emergency room records.

The Male Half has six months to slip on another if he wants to join The Female Half in that statistically miraculous group.

Adam Buckman, writing for the NYPost:

Ellen's no stiff, however. And last night, she was as charming as ever.

It was her role as host that seemed irrelevant.

The critics today will note she offended nobody. For that alone, she will likely be asked back.

We were in Hollywood in the intense hypestorm that preceded Sunday night's Oscarcast... and Degeneres was conspicuously absent from the coverage. Amazing considering that it was her first time hosting the event. (Compare this to the runup to Jon Stewart's turn last year. Or Chris Rock's. Or Whoopie's.)

Is that Billy Crystal's phone we hear ringing? Was Jerry Seinfeld's presenting spot an audition? It would make a whole of sense. (If it was an tryout, it was pretty clear that the crowd wasn't digging him. And he was obviously nervous. How very odd!)

Thousands of diabetics of all ages know them as Captain Glucose and Meterboy, we know them as Bill Kirchenbauer and Brad Slaight, respectively.

The pair are determined to do for diabetes awareness "what Smokey the Bear did for fire awareness."

Kirchenbauer has Type II, Slaight Type I.

Along with "Commissioner of Diabetes" Alan Thicke, they seek sponsorship from diabetes-related companies for a DVD, live appearances, education materials, etc. If you want to support the cause in the interim, go befriend them on their MySpace site.

The Adolph Handler series, by Emery Emery. Click on 'em all. It gets funnier and funnier. The jaw begins to lock up.

The Female Half of the Staff summed it up nicely. She said, at the midpoint of our evening hanging out at the Comedy & Magic Club in Hermosa Beach last night, that if there is a heaven, and if there is a comedy club in heaven, it would be the C.& M.C.

The Male Half must concur. (Scheduled to do seven minutes, he had a splendid time on- and offstage, sharing the evening's bill with Owen Smith, Jon McDonald, Joe Starr, Derek Hughes and Ralph Harris.)

Also in the house were Emery Emery, Tommy James (The Big Move), Jimmy Burns, Maryellen Hooper, Helen Keaney and Joanie Fagan (The 3 Blonde Moms, who were performing at the Lounge in the adjacent space).

The deluxe treatment of comics begins when one calls to confirm one's spot-- "Okay, it's an 8 o'clock show, and we have a spot for you on the roof." And, dontcha know, they're not kidding... we arrive in the alley behind the club, there's a man on the roof, with a clipboard with your name on it... and a parking space... on the roof. We're of the opinion that they should hire one more person-- one whose sole duty is to pinch people lest they think they are dreaming.

...picked up by William Morris 24 hours later.

Or so goes the word on the street.

The story goes that Rogan (as the entire comedy world knows by now) confronted Carlos Mencia onstage at the Store, the video of which ended up on YouTube. His representatives at Gersh (who also rep Mr. Mencia) dropped Mr. Rogan.

Mr. Rogan was immediately signed by William Morris.

If it ain't true, it's a great story.

There's L.C.S. auditions here on Monday, so the L.C.S. rumors are flying. A reader wrote to us and (requesting anonymity) said that the word on the street is that there ain't gonna be a house this year. That's right, no house. No "Let's throw them all into a fake/reality situation and watch the sparks fly!" We're hearing that it will be less Big Brother and more American Idol.

This will make it less of a Reality Show and, ironically, more realistic!

Should be interesting. (And, of course, we'll be providing rumors/items of interest and, eventually, real time pissing and moaning!)

We had late lunch/early dinner with FOS Steve Ochs (AKA Steve O, who, you'll recall, is a former SHECKYmagazine columnist-- "Ask Steeves") and his lovely wife FOS Julie. They took time out from their busy enterprise, Hero Product Placement, to have a leisurely meal with us at a vegetarian/Mexican joint in Burbank.

Earlier, we cruised by our old apartment in Burbank and marvelled at all the new construction in the formerly moribund (but still charming) old Burbank neighborhood.

We determined that we would visit the Synergy Cafe "Pro-pen Mike," hosted by FOS Dan Rosenberg later on, in the early part of the evening. From our perch in Pasadena, we plunged south on the 110 and, nine minutes later, we were exiting into Culver City. Who says it's hard to get around Los Angeles? (Traffic pussies from New York City, no doubt!)

Synergy/Rosenberg's pro-am show is typical of many in the L.A. area-- two dozen or so comics go up, in front of two dozen or so comics, in a room in the back of a coffee shop or a laundromat or a Mexican restaurant. (We poked our head in the room once or twice. It's a tough situation; not an easy way to start! We recalled just how fortunate we were to have started standup in a time and a place that afforded us the luxury of fat crowds and generally favorable conditions for an aspiring comic. Such is the bitch of starting out in a fiercely competitive market like L.A. or N.Y.C. Don't we have this all upside down? Aren't veterans supposed to moan about how tough they had it way back when?) Rosenberg, being the author of "How Not To Suck As An Emcee," runs a tight ship and offers a structured show and support to the participants.

After a quick stop at ASAP California Pizza Kitchen (the Thai Chicken Pizza is, as always, wicked good), we headed to Hollywood to hang at the Improv. We were misled-- we had the mistaken notion that Montreal was holding auditions this night, but it was instead Pretty Funny Women and a show produced by CollegeHumor.com stacked with heavyweights like Louis CK, Dave Attell, Mike Birbiglia and Joe Rogan.

We immediately spotted (or were we spotted by?) our Montreal Festival Buddy Jenny McKenna (whom we still refer to as Jenevieve Santoriello), who was hanging with comics Ritchie Angeles and Pat Mellon.

We took a table in the corner and were alternately graced by the presence of Todd Glass, Ric/Rick Overton and Louis Katz among others. (Mr. Katz expressed his gratitude for SHECKYmagazine.com-- It was our humble publication that enabled him to gut through his temp jobs in the early years and eventually become a real, pro comedian. Perhaps the nicest compliment we could receive!)

The forecast for today is rain. That means that we should probably leave ourselves four or five hours to get from Pasadena to Hermosa Beach tonight. If there is one group of motorists who are more tentative, more dangerous and more moronic than Atlantans after an ice storm, it is Los Angelenos after/during a rain storm. (We witnessed the abovementioned Atlanta metro area after an ice storm and it closely resembled those old demolition derbies from Islip that ABC's Wide World Of Sports usta broadcast. Los Angelenos are a deadly combo of Traffic Pussies and Weather Pussies!)

We never to get to declare anything... Okay, maybe we actually do declare things... perhaps too frequently! Readers may recall that back in April of '06, we declared (tentatively) that "Funny is the new sexy." That failed to catch on. Perhaps it wasn't subtle enough. Perhaps we should make an end run.

Well, we're here to declare that Jew-y (rhymes with "chewy") is the New Sexy!



It's a trend-- in advertising, in music, in pop culture generally-- and now, it's seeping into standup! Jew-y is the new sexy! This helps us in our quest to associate standup with desirability.

Major publications and other media entities have declared that, most notably, Sarah Silverman and Sascha Baron Cohen are "sexy" and "hot." They're merely body surfing on the crest of a larger pop culture wave.



As we all know, Funny is associated heavily with Jew-y ("...according to a survey in 1979, 80 per cent of comedians in America were Jewish." Lawrence J. Epstein, "Haunted Smile"). If Funny is Jew-y and Jew-y is the New Sexy... then, perhaps (finally!) Funny is the new Sexy!

An article on Christian Today tells how the Church of England launched a standup comedy club yesterday at the start of Lent, "as part of a wider effort to make the period more fun."

The club's founder, Helen Tomblin, hopes to keep the material clean and says that cutting out the swearing and crude material can enhance the standard of the humour, reports the BBC.

Just stick to the facts, Helen. You've come up with a nice way to entertain folks during Lent. Let's just leave it at that, shall we?,

Inexplicably, there are detractors. Specifically, comedian and writer Arthur Smith, who says that:

"Comedy without any 'grit' would be very bland."

and that

"Humour is meant to challenge a bit."

and further that

"Comedy also needs cruelty and victims,"

and that

too much "victimless comedy... can be sterile."

To which we reply:

Nonsense.

and

Not necessarily.

and

No, it doesn't.

and

Can be... but it is not always. Comedy with victims can just as easily be "sterile," if, by sterile, you mean to say it's void of humor or punchlines.

Longtime SHECKYmagazine readers know that the clean vs. dirty debate drives us nutty. Comedy, as you can all probably recite in your sleep by now, needs punchlines. If it's funny, it's all comedy. A comic can be clean or dirty... clean and dirty (often in the same set!)... gritty and/or smooth. We like to refrain from absolutes.

We were pointed toward a mini-screed in the online version of the BGNews (the student newspaper of Bowling Green State University) called "Comedy's running downhill."

It's just a few hundred words and we might be tempted to ignore such a lightweight essay, but, as hardcore SHECKYmagazine fans might recall, The Male Half attended Bowling Green State University for three years. So, in the interest of keeping the (standup comedy) discourse at an acceptable level on the campus of Dear Old BugZoo, we must turn our attention to the scribblings of Jon Ruggiero.

What exactly has happened to comedy nowadays? Stand up comedy, in my eyes, has died because of a few factors, mainly because either people take their comedy styles from the legend of the past, or they just aren't funny.

That's how it starts, then it lurches around, contradicting itself and making foggy points and grousing about... about what, exactly?

Comedy has died? Someone thinks he's an expert on comedy!

Is there anything positive about this tantrum? Yes. Someone at a student newspaper is talking about standup comedy. And he's urging his cohort to listen to the oldsters (in this case, "oldsters" are Carlin, Steven Wright and Bob Goldthwait.) while trashing some contemporary comics.

But Comedy has died? Ruggiero is being outrageous in the pages of the BGNews merely to provoke a reaction. (Says the Male Half-- Been there, done that!)

Comedy is quite alive. Comics have never been more plentiful, more visible, more... funny. Innovation is prevalent and wickedly funny material is being presented in traditional forms as well.

When one does 14 shows in a short period of time (two shows a night for seven straight nights), one starts to suffer from the "Did I just do that joke?" Syndrome. Woe to the comic who goes into a 14-show week without a set order! By night Number Six or Seven, one is beset by doubts and confusion! We're happy to report that neither of us repeated any jokes (nor did the inestimable Larry Reeb, who shared the bill). We were clearheaded enough to do our time without any lapses, but the nagging doubt is worth commenting on!

Vegas was crazy-- The not so harmonic convergence of the NBA All-Star Game, the Chinese New Year and some sort of garment industry confab made for some historic auto traffic, some bizarre and ofttimes ominous behavior on the sidewalks of Las Vegas Blvd. and congestion and chaos overall.

But we had a great time onstage. As always, it was a great time at the Comedy Club at the Riv! And on our final evening at the Riv, we had some quality hang time with Reeb and fellow comic Mark Saldana.

So, now we sit in Pasadena-- our bellies full of goat cheese and (Trader Joe's Gourmet Cracker) lavash and San Miguel Premium Lager (Imported from Manila, since 1890. At least the Male Half's belly.) and we're debating on whether to swing by a comedy club and hang out with friends or go sit in the hot tub. Right now, the hot tub is winning.

We listened to the Male Half on the KLOS Five O'Clock Funnies a few minutes ago.

(We stayed an extra day in Vegas yesterday to do our laundry and get various other mundane things out of the way, then pushed off for Los Angeles this morning. We pulled into the Kingston Inn & Suites in Pasadena in plenty of time to relax, then go down to the car to tune in 95.5 at 25 minutes past the hour.)

It sounded tremendous... we notice that they took the audio straight from the YouTube clip (the one we recorded live at Goodnight's in Raleigh). It was a nice lead in by Joe Benson, too. He pumped the appearance at the Comedy & Magic Club on Thursday (with Ralph Harris) and he said the name of the magazine at least two times!

Now the Male Half has a dilemma: Does he do the exact same set (and tack on additional two minutes or so to fill the time), or does he fashion a whole new set? Just how many KLOS listeners will show up the day after tomorrow? If a bunch do, will they care if they hear the same material again? So many questions!

Dear Britney:

So sorry to hear that you're in rehab. (Actually, we're not surprised... but we're still somewhat sorry.)

Since we know you're an avid reader of SHECKYmagazine.com, we figured this would be the best way to contact you.

We have an offer: We'd be happy to take your children and look after them.

Before you say no, consider this: The Female Half of the Staff bears a striking resemblance to you (or, at least she did... 20 years ago... And, the more you let yourself go, the more the two of you resemble each other yet again), so, when the tots look up, they'll see a face that is startlingly similar to their momma's. Also consider that, since we're in the business of show, we regularly work in a lot of locations where you have a home/residence-- remember when we narrowly missed bumping into you on the beach in Destin a coupla years back?-- (so, you'll be able to visit the little ones... or at least spy on us from afar). And, we're married-- and we intend to stay married-- so the kids will have a two-parent home. And we both wear underewear when in public! And both the Female and Male Halves can say "Hi, y'all!" while affecting a convincing southern Louisiana twang, so the Spears-lets will be comforted by the sound of their ancestral home.

All we require is $20,000 per month ($10,000 per young'un/month... a bargain!), to be re-negotiated when they reach school age. (It's private schools or nothing for these two... we insist!)

You can contact us through the mag.

Thanks, and we hope to hear from you!

If you're going to read a newspaper (and actual, physical paper, not an online version) by a pool in Vegas, there's none better than the Los Angeles Times. Among the many interesting entertainment-related pieces in Sunday's LAT there's a short interview with script rewrite specialist Billy Ray, whose second directorial effort "Breach" was released this weekend. When asked what it's like to be a rewrite man, he responds:

By the time they bring you in as a rewriter, everyone around yo is in a state of panic. Because they've done draft after draft and they've spent a ton of money and they just want someone to come in and say, "Don't worry, it's all gong to be OK and there's a way to fix this." So you get to come in and be a hero. And that's a great feeling. When you're the first writer on the movie it's like sticking your head in the mouth of a cannon.

We would link to it, but it's only available online to subscribers.

Jon Caramanica's review of Late Late Show host Craig Ferguson starts off about as badly as any review could...

THE 10 longest minutes in late night belong to Craig Ferguson. His monologue at the outset of "The Late Late Show," which he has hosted for over two years, is a comedic desert, one gag less funny than the next.

...but ends rather nicely.

Ferguson is not without his strengths: he's unfailingly affable, quick to laugh (especially at himself) and appears comfortable using his body to comedic effect. When introducing guests from shows on other channels, he mock-spits on the ground after mentioning the network's name. He's not actually indignant, but even the approximation thereof is nice.

If you can get past the first few, ghastly grafs, it's a decent review.

One unanswered question looms: Where the hell is Craig Kilborn these days?

From Las Vegas, we head west toward "the coastal sediment-filled plain located between the peninsular and transverse ranges in southern California in the United States containing the central part of the city of Los Angeles as well as its southern and southeastern suburbs."

Most of us just save a lot of time and call it "L.A."

I all goes according to plan, we'll hit the inevitable slowage at about mid-afternoon on Tuesday. We intend to stay through Saturday. We'll try to hang at the Improv on Wednesday (Montreal auditions are going on there that night).

(The Male Half will be featured on Five O'Clock Funnies on KLOS on Tuesday, at 5:25-ish. He's got a spot at the Comedy & Magic Club on Thursday night-- we're looking forward to seeing old PHL comedy colleague Ralph Harris, who'll also be on the bill as well as FOS Joe Starr!)

Comedian Johnny Rizzo was featured in the Connecticut Post the other day. His regular substitute host gig on WICC was the topic.

Turns out Rizzo has been subbing for Smith on and off for the past year.

"About a year ago, I went down to WICC to be on the Brian Smith show," Rizzo told me this week. "You know, sit in, plug my gig, say a couple of funny lines and leave. Brian extended the invitation to stop by any time. So any time it was. I was there almost every free weekday I had."

We've been pleased to provide a helf-dozen segments on the show over the past several months, doing "The SHECKYmagazine Report," providing the latest in standup news for central CT radio listeners. Hop onto WICC's website to listen live.

The MPLS Star-Turbine reports that award-winning satirist Al Franken is running for Norm Coleman's senate seat. That's U.S. Senate. (Although Franken no doubt views it as Paul Wellstone's seat!)

In a post-announcement interview in his Minneapolis townhouse, Franken tried to make the case that "humor and seriousness don't have to be in conflict with each other."

Is he serious, or is this just a way to gracefully exit his gig at Air America?

Anything can happen in this election... it's Minnesota (which we still pronounce with the patented Jesse Ventura inflection-- "Minn-uh-SOH-duh," pausing for what seems like an eternity on the "SOH" portion).

We admire Franken's nerve. Instead of merely sitting on the sidelines and taking potshots at the politicians, he's actually going to run for office and see what develops. It should make for an entertaining debate or two!

We're still posting from the cybercafe on Vegas Blvd. (the one next to the Peppermill), so we're keeping it brief. Our laptop is allegedly on its way here, via UPS Ground... we shall see.

The Riv is, as always, a great gig. (They managed to spell the Female Half's name "S-k-e-e-n" on the marquee. Is that how one spells "marquee?" They must figure she's got it all goofed up on her publicity and in her press kit!)

We're here through Sunday with Larry Reeb. (As we like to say, he puts the "Larry" back in hil-Larry-ous!")

Daniel Kinno, Wayne Federman and Suli McCullough are at the Improv at Harrah's. Jim Lauletta, Andres Fernandez are listed as being at the Stop at the Trop. Jay Leno, Katt Williams, Jamie Foxx and Arnez J are all coming to town to entertain the hordes that are descending on Vegas for the NBA All-Star Game-- the city estimates that 250,000 extra folks are coming to town to watch the millionaires in short pants battle it out at the Thomas and Mack Center.

Freelancer and FOS Larry Getlen's piece in the most recent issue of Radar Magazine hit the stands the other day (click on the link for the online version). In it, he explores the modern state of joke theft (and inlcudes a bit of the history of the practice).

While most comics take pride in performing their own material, many have built lucrative careers on borrowed bits. (Robin) Williams, for example, has long been lauded for his ability to instantaneously improvise scenes and gags. But while few question his gifts as a live performer, there's no way to know how much of his sharp-minded inspiration over the years has been provided by an unwitting writing staff. "I've been in clubs in L.A. where Robin'll walk in the room and whoever's on stage will just get off," says Boston comedian Kevin Knox.

Juicy!

In a related online development, there's a link circulating around the WWW that depicts Joe Rogan trashing Carlos Mencia onstage at the Factory. Allegedly (according to website TheSuperficial), it was enough to get Rogan banned from the Hollywood club's stage.

One thing we like about both stories is that the folks making the accusations are naming names-- including their own names! People who are making the charge are owning up to it. How refreshing. We've always looked askance at those who grumble but never go so far as to make a public accusation with their name attached. We all have a right to face our accuser... it's the American way!

But, we agree with Nick DiPaolo who says in the Radar article that the frequency of joke theft in Modern Standup America is way overstated. We've all had it happen to us-- both Halves of the Staff can cite examples of having material stolen in a bold, brazen manner. (And, we hasten to add, the "parallel thought" defense (also sometimes referred to as parallel development) has some validity.)

Articles like this (and actions like Rogan's) will keep us all more honest in the future, no?

David Noonan of Newsweek has come up with some sort of Unified Humor Theory to explain why we laugh at what we laugh at... "We" being Baby Boomers.

None of this is chiseled in stone, of course. Jon Stewart, born in 1962, is technically a boomer, but "The Daily Show" (which echoes and improves on "SNL's" 31-year-old "Weekend Update"), can hardly be considered boomer humor. And there is plenty of so-called humor produced by boomers that, well, we would prefer not to think about, including some unmentionable Dan Aykroyd and Eddie Murphy movies. ("The Adventures of Pluto Nash," anyone?)

It's a long article, with some (but not a lot) of reference to standup. (Not enough, if you ask us.)

We've been telling any club owner who'll listen (which, admittedly, isn't all that many!) that they should court the boomers. They're the ones who made comedy in the 1980's what it was (and what it is today), and they're also the ones who now have platinum MasterCards! We've been encountering them in the clubs a lot lately and they all say the same thing: It's been a long time since I laughed that hard... and I usta go out to the comedy clubs a lot in the 80's!

Welcome back!

Can't post long... off to SeaTac... Weekend at Mainstage over... Coolest green room in all of comedy! Vince Valenzuela (Seattle-ite, next week's Mainstage headliner) stopped by the club last night... Best crowds of the weekend... More to come.

Dan Carrol, Dartanion London and Scott Moran in the V.I.P Lounge at Mainstage. The room is named after the defunct furst-run syndicated series starring Pamela Anderson... we think.


Left to right: Brian Moote, Scott Moran, Jane Haze, Dan Carrol, Traci Skene, Justin Rupple, David Cope, Mike Cummins and Jeff Dye, posing in front of the newly painted Mainstage logo. (Just before piling into the club for a Brian McKim/Traci Skene SHECKYmagazine Q & A! "Meet the folks who run the WWW's most beloved magazine about standup comedy and have your questions about standup comedy answered!")

A cavalcade of PacNW comics mounted the stage last night for the second show, including headliners Brad Upton and Ty Barnett. Are the comics coming out of the woodwork to see us? To eyeball the newest comedy club in town? Who can say?!?! It matters not, as all are swell people to hang out with and it was a good time, of course.

We're flying to Vegas tomorrow. We'll post when we get our laptop back from UPS... it's on a truck between Jersey and Nevada. It's a long story.

That's the question posed in the title of a ludicrous article in the Christian Science Monitor that ran in Wednesday's Chicago Sun-Times. (We actually pick up hard copies of the antique media when we fly!)

The short answer is "Yes."

For the long, dumb answer, check out the article by the CSM's Gloria Goodale. (Poor dear, it's probably not her fault totally. She's probably the victim of a nitwit editor who can't seem to think of a good angle for a story on the debut of Sarah Silverman's Comedy Central series.)

Yet, for every step forward, say many comics and cultural observers, when it comes to being funny, women still face many societal prejudices...

Yawn.

The Sun-Times version then seeks out "local funnygals" and solicits their opinions. We don't blame them, either... they're just telling the reporter what he/she wants to hear. (And, more than likely, they're misquoted!)

The Female Half of the Staff has given up trying to argue against this inanity. Instead, she has concluded that, since she is an attractive female that has been making both male and female audiences laugh for over twenty years, she is an extraordinary human being, with near-godlike powers to amuse across genderal, socio-economic, racial and ethnic lines. All hail The Female Half of the Staff!

We know... it's just sooo cliched... but as we're walking around Seattle, we can't get the theme song from Frazier out of our heads. The producers of that classic sitcom did little to evoke the city in their scripts, but they did set a lot of scenes in a coffee shop. And if there's one thing the Queen Ann section of town has it's coffee shops... on every corner and in between... wedged into the bottom of office buildings, apartments... we even saw a small coffee shop inside a coffee shop... just in case you run out of coffee on the way to your table. (Okay, we lied about that one.)

As we strolled around the neighborhood, we realized that it's rare any more to work at a club that's actually located in a city proper. So many of the clubs have migrated to the burbs. In strip malls, in hotels, anywhere, it seems, but in or near the heart of a downtown. We took off up the hill on Queen Ann Ave., investigating rumors of a Trader Joe's. We eventually found it. Just one more of the amenities of staying downtown! (Mind you, we got nothing against those strip mall clubs, but it's nice, once in a while, to have three or four Thai restaurants within walking distance of the hotel... or sixteen coffee shops... or three Indian joints... or three used CD stores... or the station for the Monorail!

"When I die, I'm donating my body to science fiction."

Or the Science Fiction Museum, which is where we went yesterday! On the way out of the exhibit portion of the museum, on a wall of quotes about science fiction from famous people was the above quote from Steven Wright. The museum is located a couple blocks away from our hotel, just a few hundred yards from the Space Needle and all the other groovy stuff erected on the site that was the epicenter of the 1962 World's Fair.


We had dinner last night at Ten Mercer (see illustration at left) with Mainstage's Beka Barry and Robin Hordon, former talent coordinator of the defunct Catch A Rising Star that was located on Cambridge Square for 3 or 4 years, back in the late 80s/early 90s. Dinner was wonderful! We recommend the establishment!

Stopping by last night were Brad Upton (pictured above, on the left), Billy Wayne Davis (pictured with Brad Upton), Monti Carlo (afternoon drive DJ on Movin' 92.5) and Jeff Dye. The green room was packed! (And it's actually a V.I.P. Lounge... entry by non-coms is strictly controlled!) In spite of the light house, a good time was had. Davis, Monti Carlo and Dye rounded out the bill with Barry hosting. The staff could not be nicer-- The Male Half requested only a coffee but was told that, due to some opening night jitters, there was not one bean in the house! Staffer Karen quickly rushed to a nearby Starbucks (aren't they all?) and a "venti" was purchased! (That would be that "rock star" treatment that Barry is committed to heaping on the standup talent here at Mainstage!)

Folks up north are looking to give away oodles of cash to a particularly funny person. As they put it...

...Canada's legendary comedy institution is looking for the funniest person on the planet with the 2007 Yuk Yuk's Great Canadian Laugh Off. Anyone from anywhere can visit www.yukyukslaughoff.com, sign up and have a chance at fame and fortune - CDN$25,000 big ones and a TV appearance! So take a good hard look in the mirror: Are they laughing with you or at you? Then sign up before contest closes March 1.

We're posting on the computer in the lobby of the Mediterranean Inn on Queen Ann in Seattle. The folks at Everex fixed our laptop (for the second time!) then sent it back to us via UPS Ground... so it should be arriving at our apartment in the next 48 hours or so... which would be tremendous if we weren't on the other side of the continent.

We never did get our Earthlink DSL working before we took off from Jersey.

Things aren't going well, technologically for us.

At least we're in Seattle... awaiting the grand opening of the Mainstage club this evening. We stopped by last night on our way home from our casino gig in Yelm. Wednesday night saw rock, not comedy. Local sidemen (the best of the best in Seattle and surrounding area) playing together as a band for the first time... sounding as though they had shared a womb and been a band ever since.

It seems as though the principals are going to realize their dream of "Seattle's only comedy A-room." We'll keep you posted. (That the principals are all chicks, girls, gals, women, womyn, seems hardly worth noting... perhaps of interest to those folks who count genitalia like others keep track of runs batted in or touchdowns.) It looks top-notch from all we've observed.

We've got one show tonight and more on Friday and Saturday. We hope some fans of the magazine stop by.

If we can figure out a way of uploading pics, we'll do it. Expect text.

We're going to tell UPS to re-direct the Everex to the Riviera. As for Earthlink, Verizon high-speed is looking better and better.

NBC announced a new host and new talent scouts for the upcoming season of Last Comic Standing:

NBC's unscripted laughfest Last Comic Standing will return to the schedule this summer with new host Bill Bellamy, new talent scouts including Last Comic Standing alumni Alonzo Bodden, Ant and Kathleen Madigan -- and an all new quest -- to find the funniest new comedian in the world. The Emmy-nominated series broadens its scope this season by searching internationally for the world's funniest comedian, holding casting calls in London, Montreal and Sydney, Australia in addition to Los Angeles, New York, Minneapolis, San Antonio and Tempe. Celebrity judges will also join the talent scouts as they search for the world's funniest new comic.

Count Shake-ula (Anthony Clarke), who did such a smashing job hosting the fourth season, will go on to other projects. Bill Bellamy, so likeable in the ill-fated Fox series Fastlane, will probably be an engaging host. RossMark, the two-headed Simon Cowell imitation, are, we assume, history. This bodes well for the selection/audition portion of the show. It may actually be... funny.

Editors note: We meant to dub the former scouts "ReadMark," an amalgam of the names of the former LCS scouts, not "RossMark," which, as a reader pointed out, is merely an amalgam of the first and last names of one scout!

That's Brian Haley on the left, with the Female Half of the Staff on the right,. They shared the bill at the Comedy Works in Bristol (PHL), PA, this past weekend.

Haley is getting back on the standup horse after years of being solely an actor. He's relocated to the NY area and is determined to get the ol' headline set sharpened up. He's been doing small- to medium-sized clubs on this side of the country, flying under the radar (at least until he works with the editor and publisher of the WWW's most beloved magazine about standup).

Haley, readers may recall, was a white-hot standup in the boom years (four Tonight Show appearances (with Johnny!), roles in high-profile movies, guest shots on sitcoms), who left standup for acting. He's back on the standup stage now-- part of a trend, it seems! Standup comics who left the actual standup for other ventures-- writing, acting, what-have-you-- who are back to their first love.

Hop on to his myspace and request his friendship-- he's only been on a few days and he only has three friens-- one of whom is "Tom!"

Far left: Penguin poses with Big Jay Oakerson at Rascals in Cherry Hill last night. Near left: Cover of DVD of Bob Saget's "Farce of the Penguins," in which Saget, with the help of Samuel L. Jackson, Lewis Black, Mo'Nique and others, manages to find the lewd in docu sensation "March of the Penguins." According to Wikipedia, Saget...

...stated on the Howard Stern Show on January 29th, 2007 and Late Night with Conan O'Brien on January 30, 2007 that he originally wanted to simply redub the documentary March of the Penguins but did not receive permission from the filmmakers.

In late November, the film, sourced from a screening, was leaked on the internet. There has been no response from the production company as of yet.

The occasion for the frivolity at left (a tremendous penguins suit, btw!), was the launch of the campaing to promote the DVD release.

Pardon our web-speak... it's all the rage these days.

The folks at JFL are calling it a portal. (The "P-word" hasn't been current for some time... but we think we know what they're getting at.) Let them explain:

Each profile page will feature a short bio, along with at least one photo and most importantly, links to their current website, agent's website, show dates, DVD's for sale and any other links which they believe may help increase their exposure. In order to help us establish this portal and create a special page for your profile, we would like to ensure that you commit to uploading three to five performance or sketch clips (not purely promo reels) that can be shown to maximize your exposure. We ask that these clips be kept under two minutes. Please also keep us abreast of your touring schedule, TV appearances and the like. More content and contact with us ensures that you are included on rotation on our home page and possibly other pages to help deliver timely visibility. Please note that the artist owns their clips, they are not for download or sale by us from the site, nor do we ask for exclusivity. We will withdraw submitted clips at anytime the artist (or representative) asks, as well as delete your profile if you wish to terminate participation. This is to be your profile.

So... JFL invites all comics to allow them to submit vids, skeds, pics and such. FOS Paul Ash sent us word of the latest development. He says it'll have "a structure similar to MySpace with elements of YouTube." It's at hahaha.com.

If you've noticed that we're posting less often or if you've noticed that there's been a paucity of postings here at SHECKYmagazine.com, it means that:

1. You've sensed a smaller number of posts and/or...

2. You've noticed that the number of posts lately has been smaller than usual and you've got a good vocabulary.

Since the move, we've been depending on dialup! Our DSL is experiencing difficulties. We've been on the horn with "Keith" from Bangalore lately, though, so it should just be a matter of days until we're up to lightning speed!

They're celebrating a quarter of a century in Atlanta, at the Punchline. We got an email from Punchline proprietor Jamie Bendall:

On February 11, 2007 we are going to present a show during which 25 comedians will perform to celebrate the 25 years The Punchline has been in business.

If you are interested in participating in this show, please let us know. Shoot me an email to let me know if you are going to be in the neighborhood...

He's taking emails at jamie(at sign)punchline.com.