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Gary Gulman

Question21: Gary Gulman

In which we quiz a comedian
on matters both earth-shattering and inconsequential...

Gary Gulman, standup comic and former accountant is in The L.C.S. House! (As of this upload!) Visit his website HERE.

1. What song is stuck in your head right now?

Herbie Hancock's "Rock It"

2. Who is most surprised that you are a comic?

Strangers on airplanes. I no longer tell people I'm a comic. I tell them I'm a chemist, in town to accept the Van Duessen Award for adding a new element to the Periodic Table. The name of the element is Garanium. I tell them it will not be put on the table until it has proven to be stable for 80 years. It will be my legacy. I highly recommend making up professions for strangers. It's exhilarating.

3. Who are you most often mistaken for?

I'm often mistaken for either of my older brothers. The famous person I am mistaken for is Eric Bana of Hulk fame.

4. What would you like to have delivered to your door?

The Clinton autobiography I just ordered online. The Who's Tommy pinball machine is a close second.

5. Who in show business would you like to meet at a party?

Howard Stern. I love that guy. I think he is a genius and I've heard he's a decent guy offstage.

6. Do you have a favorite month?

July. It has my birthday, July 4, the Major League All star game, heat, summer vacation. Since I've lived in LA, my entire life is summer vacation. I'm living a permanent July.

7. Have you ever had a catch phrase?

Right now my catch phrase is OY GEVALT! In first grade my catch phrase was "Don't get personal." In high school my catch phrase was "I'll dispel that myth." My next catch phrase will be "Thank you. Come again!" said with an Indian accent or maybe "Wha' happened?" (Right now comics are calling those two catch phrases HACK. Go ahead!!)

8. What is in your wallet?

I do not carry a wallet. I use a money clip. In my money clip is $24, 200 receipts from the ATM, a bunch of credit cards, my license (not a great picture), a laminated paper that says, "Be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid." and my Barnes & Noble Reader's advantage card. Oh yeah, also my mom's Costco card which I kept because it has the cutest little picture of her on the back.

9. In the "It Occurred Offstage Category" what Gary Gulman story is most often retold by you or others?

This one time I stole a heckler's digital video camera because he wanted to record his girlfriend. I told him there were consequences to heckling and I'd give it back to him after her performance. I did.

10. In the "It Occurred Onstage Category" what Gary Gulman story is most often retold by you or others?

This one time a heckler actually jumped on stage with me. I shoved him off and he lost his balance and fell backwards into the crowd. He then went and told on me. Gulman 2 Hecklers 0.

11. Who made you laugh hardest when you were ten years old?

Peter Sellers. He still has yet to be eclipsed.

12. What do you buy only when it's on sale?


13. What movie do you watch every time it's on television?

"Quiz Show"

14. Do you embarrass easily?

Yes, I am in constant fear of being made fun of or laughed at.

15. What year was your best one so far?

I must say that this year has been my best so far. I say that every year though but this will be tough to beat.

16. What year was your worst one so far?

My freshman year of college and my junior year of high school are a tie. Both were ruined by unrequited love. Women continue to be my Achilles heel.

17. How do you indulge yourself?

Ben & Jerry's Phish Food. So good they named a band after it.

18. Where is the one place everybody should go?

Israel, no joke. I went last summer with Wayne Federman, Dan Naturman, and Avi Lieberman and it was the time of my life.

19. What upsets you that shouldn't?

Any kind of computer malfunction.

20. How would you like to be introduced?

And this year's recipient of The Van Duessen Award for discovering a new element for the Periodic Table of the Elements called Garanium: Chemist Gary Gulman.

Here's where we turn the interview over to the interviewee. What question would you like to ask you?

21. What are your favorite episodes of The Simpsons, Seinfeld and Curb Your Enthusiasm?

Answer: The Flaming Moe/Homer Episode, The one where George does the Opposite, and The Crazy Eyes Killer Episode. HOME Back to the Top