||SHECKYmagazine.com HOME||SUMMER 2004||
1. What song is stuck in your head right now?
Herbie Hancock's "Rock It"
2. Who is most surprised that you are a comic?
Strangers on airplanes. I no longer tell people I'm a comic.
I tell them I'm a chemist, in town to accept the Van Duessen
Award for adding a new element to the Periodic Table. The name
of the element is Garanium. I tell them it will not be put
on the table until it has proven to be stable for 80 years.
It will be my legacy. I highly recommend making up professions
for strangers. It's exhilarating.
3. Who are you most often mistaken for?
I'm often mistaken for either of my older brothers.
The famous person I am mistaken for is Eric Bana of Hulk fame.
4. What would you like to have delivered to your door?
The Clinton autobiography I just ordered online.
The Who's Tommy pinball machine is a close second.
5. Who in show business would you like to meet at a party?
Howard Stern. I love that guy. I think he is a genius
and I've heard he's a decent guy offstage.
6. Do you have a favorite month?
July. It has my birthday, July 4, the Major League
All star game, heat, summer vacation. Since I've lived
in LA, my entire life is summer vacation. I'm living a
7. Have you ever had a catch phrase?
Right now my catch phrase is OY GEVALT!
In first grade my catch phrase was "Don't get personal."
In high school my catch phrase was "I'll dispel that myth." My
next catch phrase will be "Thank you. Come again!" said with an
Indian accent or maybe "Wha' happened?" (Right now comics are
calling those two catch phrases HACK. Go ahead!!)
8. What is in your wallet?
I do not carry a wallet. I use a money clip. In my money
clip is $24, 200 receipts from the ATM, a bunch of credit cards,
my license (not a great picture), a laminated paper that says,
"Be bold and mighty forces will come to your aid."
and my Barnes & Noble Reader's advantage card. Oh yeah, also
my mom's Costco card which I kept because it has the cutest
little picture of her on the back.
9. In the "It Occurred Offstage Category" what Gary Gulman story is most often retold by you or others?
This one time I stole a heckler's digital video camera
because he wanted to record his girlfriend. I told him there
were consequences to heckling and I'd give it back to him after
her performance. I did.
10. In the "It Occurred Onstage Category" what Gary Gulman story is most often retold by you or others?
This one time a heckler actually jumped on stage with me.
I shoved him off and he lost his balance and fell backwards
into the crowd. He then went and told on me. Gulman 2 Hecklers 0.
11. Who made you laugh hardest when you were ten years old?
Peter Sellers. He still has yet to be eclipsed.
12. What do you buy only when it's on sale?
13. What movie do you watch every time it's on television?
14. Do you embarrass easily?
Yes, I am in constant fear of being made fun
of or laughed at.
15. What year was your best one so far?
I must say that this year has been my best so far.
I say that every year though but this will be tough to beat.
16. What year was your worst one so far?
My freshman year of college and my junior year of high school
are a tie. Both were ruined by unrequited love. Women continue
to be my Achilles heel.
17. How do you indulge yourself?
Ben & Jerry's Phish Food. So good they named
a band after it.
18. Where is the one place everybody should go?
Israel, no joke. I went last summer with Wayne Federman,
Dan Naturman, and Avi Lieberman and it was the time of my life.
19. What upsets you that shouldn't?
Any kind of computer malfunction.
20. How would you like to be introduced?
And this year's recipient of The Van Duessen Award
for discovering a new element for the Periodic Table of
the Elements called Garanium: Chemist Gary Gulman.
Here's where we turn the interview over to the interviewee. What question would you like SHECKYmagazine.com to ask you?
21. What are your favorite episodes of The Simpsons, Seinfeld
and Curb Your Enthusiasm?
Answer: The Flaming Moe/Homer Episode, The one where
George does the Opposite, and The Crazy Eyes Killer Episode.
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